Conversation ( A message to my childhood best friend)

Hey guys, this is a response to a challenge. I was engaged in a conversation with my brother and my cousin about life generally. We were gisting and it was going well when all of a sudden my brother said “oh your friend said she’s no longer part of your life and she has accepted that”. This might mean nothing to you guys but it means something to me because the person who said it was one of my childhood best friends and we did some things together.

This year, I planned to rekindle our friendship but with what she said I started rethinking and it made me realize that most times we try to bring out something from nowhere. From her perspective, our friendship was dead and to me, I felt it was at its challenging stage.

Now, I’m trying to think how we actually got to this stage and nothing is coming to my mind. I’m not sad about what she said but rather shocked! The truth is we grew up and everyone chose their path (we are not even so old). Sometime last year, she told my brother to ask me if she did anything to me and I was surprised. At a point in my life, I felt like she did not want to be friends with me because I am naturally not a jazzy person ( I felt she looked at me like I wasn’t like her so why should we be friends) this bothered me at some point and I wanted her to come to school so we could fix whatever was wrong.

I knew our friendship was suffering at some point wen I found out she did not even have my phone number ( this disturbed me, lol). When I realized this, I started staying to myself when we go to church and only just say hi or wave at her. I did not want to try to fix our friendship because I knew that I wasn’t ready to have any emotional talk with anyone. I also just found out that she just asked for my number to wish me a happy birthday and I’m glad she thought of me.

I contemplated deleting her contact because there is no use, we should just act like we were never friends. I take things like this very deep and I know I sound pained but I am not angry or anything close to that. I have so many wonderful friends but it’s going to be nice if we start talking again and I’m not saying we should be best friends because I know that cannot happen.

So this post is for you my lost friend, I loved you so much, my friends would testify but then you started treating me in a very weird way, hence, my behavior towards you but it’s not nice that you did not have my phone number ( haba! When did we become strangers). My mum is always asking what happened to us and I never know what to tell her but if what you really told my brother is what you have decided, then so be it! I hope one day, we would sha not become enemies. I even dreamt you were moving to Canada and I was crying. I took that as a sign that God was telling me to try and fix this. I’m going to try but I feel very socially awkward around you because we have nothing to say to each other.

The whole essence of this post is that most times we fall out of touch with most friends and we feel like we should give up on them. The truth is that one of you still cares and that person should try to fix the friendship if it really mattered. Don’t let it get to the stage I’m at with her!

Please drop comments if you know how I can fix this! I don’t want ya to be strangers because that is what we are now.

Yours truly,

Hillary.

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